OMG — Oh My God!
Embarrassments? That happens at other clubs, but surely not at the model institution that is FCB. Bunkum! From dubious executives to Trapattoni's lost-in-translation press conference.
Criminals and Dirty Deals
Criminal records in the boardroom, suspicious World Cup deals and a secret Kirch contract.
A Role Model for Active Rehabilitation
FC Bayern was once run to a significant degree by personnel with criminal records.
"FC Bayern is a criminal club." That's what the Bayern haters say. But it was once true — if in an entirely different way. For FC Bayern was once run to a significant degree by personnel with criminal records.
A role model for active rehabilitation, then. Karl-Heinz Rummenigge accepted a penalty order for a customs offence in 2013 and paid a fine of €250,000. He had failed to declare two luxury watches from Qatar. A judge at the Landshut district court sentenced him to 140 daily rates. According to FOCUS, the court assumed Rummenigge had €1,785 per day at his free disposal.
Ex-president Uli Hoeneß served 21 months in prison for tax evasion.
The Kaiser, the World Cup and the Deals with the Sheikhs
Suspicious payments and bizarre friendlies in Malta, Thailand and Tunisia around the 2006 World Cup bid.
Shady deals are not uncommon in Bavaria, and FC Bayern are no stranger to them either. This concerns suspicious payments and bizarre friendlies — in Malta, Thailand and Tunisia.
CEO Karl-Heinz Rummenigge denied that the club played friendlies in 2000 (when the World Cup was being awarded) in precisely those countries whose FIFA executive committee members would ultimately decide on the tournament's allocation. And at prices that were far from market standard. Maltese investigators took an interest in one very specific contract that was signed shortly before the World Cup vote at the private residence of Malta's then football association president, Joe Mifsud.
The lucrative TV contract with Swiss TV rights agency CWL brought the association decent revenue. It concerned the television rights for the 2001 friendly between Malta and Bayern. Allegedly, $250,000 flowed into the coffers of Malta's football association. The background remained largely unknown; the allegation was never conclusively proven.
Since 2015, Beckenbauer has been at the centre of international investigations. The mystery of the €6.7 million was never resolved before his death.
Another Dodgy Deal — The Kirch Contract
Bayern signed a secret 18-page contract with the Kirch Group — up to 50 million marks per year.
And this one is proven. Evidently, Bayern were once quite willing to be bought. According to research by "manager magazin," on 9 December 1999, Bayern manager Uli Hoeneß, board member Karl Hopfner and ex-president Fritz Scherer concluded a secret contract with then-Kirch executives Dieter Hahn and Stefan Ziffzer. In the 18-page document, both parties agreed to "exclusive cooperation."
Under the terms, the Kirch Group undertook to compensate Bayern through to the 2004/05 season for the difference between the revenue from central marketing by the DFB and the potential revenue from individual marketing of TV rights — a distortion of competition unprecedented in league history.
With this payment, Kirch is said to have bought FC Bayern's consent to continued central marketing of Bundesliga rights. Bayern manager Hoeneß subsequently lobbied in the league committee for the rights to be awarded to the Kirch Group. In the secret contract, Kirch guaranteed the Bundesliga club compensation of up to 30 million marks per year for the first three years. From the 2003/04 season, up to 50 million marks per season would have been due.
In practice, Kirch transferred approximately 40 million marks to Bayern for the 2000/01 and 2001/02 seasons, until the Kirch Group went insolvent. As recently as the summer of 1999, Bayern's leadership had insisted on individual marketing of TV rights by Bundesliga clubs, hoping this would yield higher fees than central marketing through the DFB.
Coaching Chaos and Mediocrity
Revolts, failed coaches and a phase when Bayern almost became an average club.
Fear of Max Merkel
The Bundesliga's first player revolt succeeded — the pampered Bayern stars rejected the taskmaster.
The end of Gerd Müller and Wilhelm Neudecker: in 1979, there was constant friction between coach Pal Csernai and superstar Gerd Müller. The feud is said to have started with Müller's substitution during a match against Eintracht Frankfurt. Gerd Müller fled to the USA. Csernai had only got the job because his former boss, Gyula Lorant, had been sacked.
Bayern president Neudecker wanted to hire former 1860 coach Max Merkel. Merkel had a reputation as a taskmaster, and the rather pampered Bayern stars were afraid. They rejected coach Merkel and Neudecker resigned. Instead, Pal Csernai became head coach.
The Neudecker era was over, the Bundesliga's first player revolt had succeeded — for under Pal Csernai, Bayern became champions twice.
The Heynckes Promise, Coaching Flops and Mediocrity
In the early 1990s, the record champions went through turbulent times — coaches, failures and near-mediocrity.
In the early 1990s, the record champions went through turbulent times. Numerous coaches, including Erich Ribbeck and Sören Lerby, tried with little success to revitalise the team. The period after Jupp Heynckes' dismissal in October 1991 was a phase of failure.
Bayern were no longer at the cutting edge, either tactically or in terms of personnel — in Europe and in Germany. Defeats rained down, and early exits from European competitions against mediocre opponents became not the exception but, for a time, the norm. Briefly, it seemed as if FC Bayern might become an average Bundesliga club.
And the Munich side didn't exactly have vast sums in the bank at the time, either. The worst season of this period was 1991/92. On 8 October 1991, Heynckes had to vacate his seat on the bench after a poor start to the season.
His promise, made on Munich's town hall balcony in 1990, that he would win the European Cup with Bayern, and his somewhat overly intense manner at the time, proved his undoing. Even the previous season had yielded "only" the runners-up spot. On top of that, they had been humiliated to the bone in the DFB-Pokal by the amateurs of FC Weinheim and had been eliminated from the European Cup by Red Star Belgrade. The new campaign turned into a total disaster for FC Bayern.
After another cup exit at their own stadium against second-division FC Homburg and a 1-4 home mauling on matchday 12 by Stuttgarter Kickers, manager Uli Hoeneß could no longer stand by his friend Heynckes. Captain Klaus Augenthaler had retired before the season; key players Jürgen Kohler and Stefan Reuter had emigrated to Italy. Goalkeeper Raimond Aumann and his deputy Sven Scheuer were sidelined long-term through injury.
With a miserable 36:40 points, Bayern finished the season in 10th place. To this day, Hoeneß considers the sacking of Heynckes the biggest mistake of his managerial career.
How to Sack the Sir — Embarrassing and Touching
Two board members flew to Gran Canaria by private jet to sack Ribbeck — and couldn't bring themselves to do it.
In the competition for Bayern's worst coach of the last 30 years, three names always come up: Jürgen Klinsmann, Sören Lerby and Erich Ribbeck. How Bayern sacked Ribbeck — embarrassing and touching in equal measure. Sir Erich succeeded the ill-fated Sören Lerby in March 1992.
Shortly before him, Franz Beckenbauer and Karl-Heinz Rummenigge were brought into the club as crisis managers and elected vice-presidents. With a newly assembled squad, Ribbeck competed for the 1992/93 title — but managed no more than the runners-up spot behind Otto Rehhagel's Werder Bremen. What stuck in the memory was Ribbeck's "coffin-nail statement" that they didn't necessarily have to become German champions.
When, in his second year in charge, the team again failed to get going and was eliminated from both the DFB-Pokal and the UEFA Cup during the first half of the season, the Bayern grandees met during the winter break to discuss how to dispose of "The Sir" with style. Ribbeck, however, had flown straight to Gran Canaria for his holiday after the mid-season break.
Not a good idea. At the subsequent board meeting, grumbling about the coaching situation set in. But there was no alternative. Uli Hoeneß suddenly proposed vice-president Beckenbauer, who accepted with a heavy heart. The Kaiser was only willing to succeed his friend Ribbeck, though, if Ribbeck resigned of his own accord. Legend has it that shortly before Christmas, two board members flew to Gran Canaria by private jet. Sir Erich, suspecting nothing, hosted the two surprise guests so warmly that they couldn't bring themselves to tell him the truth.
Back to Munich without delivering the sacking notice. 25,000 marks in flight costs down the drain! Whether the story is true has never been proven. What is documented is that Franz Beckenbauer replaced Erich Ribbeck and stepped in for the second time. In the second half of the season he collected just as many points as Ribbeck had in the first. But with the "luminary" as team boss, the squad chased down autumn champions Eintracht Frankfurt — with Bayern-baiter Klaus Toppmöller ("Bye-bye Bayern") — and finished one point ahead of 1. FC Kaiserslautern as champions. Nobly, Ribbeck received the full championship bonus (250,000 DM) and his salary through to 30 June (500,000 DM). That's how you say goodbye to a friend...
Hoeneß on His Own Fans — Mega-Embarrassing
At the 2007 AGM, Hoeneß berated the club's own fans — tone embarrassing, facts not entirely wrong.
Even Bayern's officials are not entirely free of graceless missteps. At the 2007 annual general meeting, Uli Hoeneß suddenly lost his temper and berated the club's own fans. Among other things, he accused them of being responsible for the frequently poor atmosphere in the stadium.
He also calculated that only the high VIP-box fees made the cheap ticket prices in the stadium possible. Tone and style — embarrassing. Facts — not entirely wrong.
Legendary Performances
Furious speeches, lost-in-translation moments and detective stories.
Beckenbauer's Furious Speech in Lyon (2001)
This is old-timers' football! — The Kaiser's dressing-down after a 0-3 humiliation triggered the Champions League run.
The "Champions League banquet" is an absolute must-attend for lovers and haters of FC Bayern München alike. These are the finest hours of the Munich club's corporate identity — and occasionally of German football itself.
On 6 March 2001, the players sat blank-eyed at dinner in their team hotel in Lyon. Olympique Lyon had just dismantled them 0-3 in the second group phase of the Champions League. Now a win was needed in the final home match against Arsenal, or they would be out of the "Königsklasse" early. Something had to be done, thought Bayern president Franz Beckenbauer. The Kaiser knew the power of the microphone and the force of the furious speech.
"Die Frage ist immer, wie man ein Spiel verliert. Das war heute eine Blamage. So, wie wir gespielt haben, das hat nichts mit Fußball zu tun. Das ist eine andere Sportart, die wir spielen. Wir haben zugeschaut, wir haben körperlos gespielt. Das ist nicht Fußball, das ist Uwe-Seeler-Traditionsmannschaft, Altherrenfußball! Tut mir leid, wenn ich das so sagen muss. Es ist so. Es hat von der Tribüne aus vermutlich noch schlimmer ausgesehen, als Ihr es unten auf dem Platz mitbekommen habt. Das hat nichts mit Fußball zu tun!"
Translation: "The question is always how you lose a match. Today was a disgrace. The way we played has nothing to do with football. It's a different sport we're playing. We stood and watched, played without any physicality. This is not football — this is Uwe Seeler's veterans' side, old-timers' football! I'm sorry if I have to say it like that. It is what it is. It probably looked even worse from the stands than you experienced down on the pitch. This has nothing to do with football!"
He dressed down the stars around Stefan Effenberg. "We are certainly in a situation where we can still salvage something. But you have to completely change your game. It is five minutes to midnight! Today's opponents were an object lesson.
This is Olympique Lyon, this is not Real Madrid, FC Barcelona or Manchester United — and today we got a lesson. Why? Because the attitude wasn't right. Because we're currently playing a football that is simply no longer adequate.
Maybe you played that way 30 years ago. You need to get back to the ABCs of football, and fast: tackles. If you don't contest the tackles, you're always the second winner. Even against a team like today's, which is certainly a good one, but not one of the best. You end up looking like an apprentice, and at the end you can be glad and say: 'Thank you very much for only losing 3-0.'"
For Beckenbauer it was clear: "In the future, you can't do this, or we'll all have to look for a different profession!" The next day on the Harald Schmidt show, they were already guessing which professions those might be... and kept landing on "professional footballer." Be that as it may.
In the end, Beckenbauer's words worked wonders: the Bayern players, who spontaneously gathered in Effenberg's room after the dressing-down and swore to prove the Kaiser wrong, finally won the European champions' trophy again after 25 years — without losing another match, including the final against Valencia in Milan.
Giovanni Trapattoni — Lost in Translation
Was erlauben Strunz? — The most memorable press conference in Bundesliga history, 10 March 1998.
It remains to this day the most memorable press conference in Bundesliga history. Everyone says so. Especially those who were there — and some of whom, even years later, still can't believe it. Munich, 10 March 1998. When Bayern coach Giovanni Trapattoni, in a red training top, stepped up to the lectern in the press room two days after a 0-1 defeat at Schalke, nobody suspected a thing.
No wonder. The Italian began his monologue — which would enter German football history and everyday language — quite calmly and composedly.
"Es gibt im Moment in diese Mannschaft, oh, einige Spieler vergessen Ihnen Profi, was sie sind! Iss klar, diese Worte, ist möglich verstehen, was ich sage gesagt? Ein Trainer ist nicht ein Idiot! Ein Trainer zeigen, sehe, was passieren in Platz! In diese Spiel, es waren zwei oder drei Spieler, die waren schwach wie eine Flasche leer."
Translation: "There are at the moment in this team, oh, some players forget they are professionals! Is clear, these words, is possible to understand what I have said? A coach is not an idiot! A coach sees what happens on the pitch! In this game, there were two or three players who were weak like a bottle empty."
For those who don't speak the Italo-German mix: Basler, Scholl and Strunz simply couldn't be bothered! "These players," lamented Trap, "complain more than they play." True: when it came to personal demands, this trio was always at the very front of the queue. One player in particular drove the Italian to distraction: Thomas Strunz. "Strunz ist zwei Jahre hier, hat gespielt zehn Spiele, ist immer verletzt. Was erlauben Strunz?" ("Strunz has been here two years, has played ten games, is always injured. What allow Strunz?")
It became a catchphrase, as would later become clear... Trapattoni had had enough: "Ich bin müde jetzt Vater diese Spieler, eh verteidige immer diese Spieler." ("I am tired now father of these players, always defending these players.") In plain German: he was dropping them, and probably rightly so. "Ich habe immer die Schulde über diese Spieler, einer ist Mario, andere ist Mehmet. Strunz hat nur gespielt 25 Prozent diese Spiel." ("I always take the blame for these players, one is Mario, other is Mehmet. Strunz has only played 25 per cent of this game.")
And he closed with: "Ich habe fertig." ("I have finished.") — another phrase that entered everyday German. At season's end, Trapattoni was indeed finished. At least he departed over the Alps with the DFB-Pokal. The 2-1 winning goal in the final against Duisburg was scored, incidentally, by Mario Basler...
Uli and the Detectives — Bayern Spy on Basler
Before sacking Mario Basler, Bayern had him surveilled by a private investigator in a green Golf.
Bayern spy on Basler. That's how it goes! Bayern stars Mario Basler and Sven Scheuer headed off to a rehabilitation stay in Donaustauf in November 1999 — and at the end, at least the Palatinate native Basler had to find a new job. The innocuous visit to a Regensburg pizzeria ended in a full-blown brawl between Scheuer and a heckler, after which Mario Basler had "an outstanding conversation with a police officer."
At FC Bayern, nobody found this kind of metaphor amusing. Basler and Scheuer were suspended; the keeper was later pardoned, but for "Super Mario" it was over at FCB. He moved back to 1. FC Kaiserslautern, where he had made his Bundesliga debut in 1988/89 in the meaningless final match at Bayer Leverkusen (1-0).
The sacking, which in retrospect seems disproportionate, had a long backstory. Before Bayern handed Basler his papers, they had him surveilled by a private investigator. A green Golf shadowed the running wonder. A little later, Bayern manager Uli Hoeneß summoned him for a meeting. "I said: 'So, Manager, everything okay?'
'And what's new?' He says, 'Nothing, you didn't do anything at the weekend. Nothing happened.' I said, 'Shit, right? You could have saved the money on the idiot who followed me in the green Golf,'" Basler recounted in his characteristically colourful style in the Cologne "Express." Hoeneß, Basler continued, had immediately given himself away through his reaction. "Super Mario" on the subject: "He went all red and then he started grinning.
I said, 'If that guy wasn't put on me by you yesterday, you can shit in my shoes.' He fell about laughing." Knowing full well, too, that his detective had already collected plenty of incriminating material — Basler was an avid casino-goer, and drank and smoked unashamedly in public. Now Basler's time was up and the Palatinate boy Mario was back home: "I'm glad I don't have to listen to this nonsense from Uli Hoeneß any more."
Franck Ribéry Goes Off the Deep End
A gold-plated steak in Dubai triggered a first-rate shitstorm — Ribéry's response was nuclear.
All Franck Ribéry actually wanted during the 2018/19 winter break was to eat a steak at the restaurant "Nusr-Et" in Dubai. Chef Nusret Gökçe wanted to go the extra mile and served the Frenchman not just any steak, but a gold-plated piece of meat for a few euros more. Franck shared the enjoyment of the steak with his fans via his Instagram account.
It did not go down well. A first-rate shitstorm ensued. But Ribéry hit back. Via his Instagram stories, he told the critics of his culinary preferences: "Let's dot the i's and cross the t's for 2019. Starting with the envious, the angry, who were surely created by a broken condom: fuck your mothers, your grandmothers and your entire family tree.
I owe you nothing; my success I owe above all to God, to myself and to those close to me who believed in me. You are nothing more than pebbles in my shoe." In a further comment, he turned to "the pseudo-journalists who always criticise me and my actions."
When he did something good, it was never in the media. "No, they'd rather talk about the holidays I spend with my family, they scan my actions, what I eat, etc.," the Bayern professional concluded. Support came from Ribéry's wife Wahiba. Even before Franck, she raged on Instagram: "Don't worry, we are all very pleased to see that we are being followed even in the kitchen. I am on the verge of throwing up, believe me.
Poor France, that there are actually so many idiots and pigs!" Incidentally: the steak Ribéry ordered was an Ottoman steak. Without gold it costs €239 according to the menu. With precious metal, presumably considerably more. However, it is safe to assume that Ribéry did not pay for the steak. Compliments of the chef.
Bayern on Screen and in the Studio
When Bayern stars step in front of cameras or reach for the microphone, the cringe is guaranteed.
When Sepp Maier Joined the Army
In 1967, Maier, Müller and coach Čajkovski were cast in Pickelhaube helmets for a Bavarian military farce.
Bayern stars on the silver screen. Berlin director Werner Jacobs (1909-1999) certainly realised better cinematic projects than the film adaptations of Ludwig Thoma's "Lausbubengeschichten" (Rascal Stories). We recall timeless classics such as "Und sowas muss um 8 ins Bett" (And This Has to Be in Bed by 8), "Die Lümmel von der ersten Bank — Zur Hölle mit den Paukern" (The Rascals of the Front Row — To Hell with the Teachers) or "Was ist denn bloß mit Willi los?" (What on Earth Is Wrong with Willi?).
For "Die Lümmel von der ersten Bank," young star Hansi Kraus, aka Pepe Nietnagel, was deployed by Jacobs twice in 1967. Alongside the teacher film, he also directed "Wenn Ludwig ins Manöver zieht" (When Ludwig Goes on Manoeuvres), the second part of Thoma's Rascal Stories. The cast was star-studded. In addition to Kraus and Heidelinde Weis, Georg Thomalla, Claus Wilcke ("Hui Buh") and Friedrich von Thun tried their hand in the Bavarian-Prussian military farce.
And because even in 1967 nobody could get past FC Bayern München, players Sepp Maier and Gerd Müller as well as coach Zlatko "Tschik" Čajkovski were cast and kitted out in uniforms complete with Pickelhaube helmets. Today, of course, this is politically completely incorrect. Čajkovski as the army cook, Sepp Maier as "Sepp Maier" and Gerd Müller as "Müller" — one can imagine the intellectual ambition of this comedy. The critics had seen enough: "At times, one has the impression of watching a promotional film."
We Don't Want to Say Anything Bad!
Beckenbauer starred in Libero (1973) — a social critique behind Munich's football glitterati that critics panned.
That feeling persisted in 1973, when HE finally stepped in front of the cameras. We refer to the social critic Franz Beckenbauer, who in "Libero" — the eponymous film about himself — cast a critical eye behind the façade of Munich's football glitterati in the early 1970s. Abysses opened up.
With above all one bitter realisation: "I'm quitting football." To lend this drastic demand weight in front of Harald Leipnitz, the Kaiser ordered: "Gib mir an Whisky, I spiel eh nimmer" ("Give me a whisky, I'm not playing any more"). The film was panned by critics, except by former national coach Sepp Herberger, who also had to endure it: "Mer wolle ja nix Schlechtes sagen!" ("We don't want to say anything bad!") was his verdict — somehow bad after all.
Potato Fritz
In 1976, Paul Breitner rode as Sergeant Stark alongside Hardy Krüger in a cult Western Made in Germany.
In 1976, Hardy Krüger as "Potato Fritz" rode across the cinema screen under the direction of Peter Schamoni. Along for the ride: Sergeant Stark, alias Paul Breitner. Add professional villains Anton Diffring ("The Blue Max") and Arthur Brauss ("Das Mädchen von Hongkong") plus blonde beauty Diana Körner. Plus music by Udo Jürgens — it doesn't get more cult-cinema than this.
Success seemed guaranteed. Oscar-worthy Western cinema Made in Germany — we'd have loved to be on set. That the presumed-dead Captain Henry ultimately "helps the Native Americans get their rights" is surely also in the spirit of football rebel Paul Breitner...
Good Friends Should Never Sing
There is no greater cringe in Bundesliga history than when Bayern stars reach for the microphone.
Nonsense by the notes with Bayern stars. There is no greater cringe in FC Bayern's — indeed the Bundesliga's — history than when Munich's stars reach for the microphone! We do not, of course, know how many Maß of beer after a Bayern victory are required to sing along to these lowlights from the world of German Schlager and pop culture without truly bad conscience...
The Kaiser started it. Franz Beckenbauer recorded the saccharine song "Gute Freunde" (Good Friends) in 1966. To this day, Beckenbauer has dismissed the record — which reached only number 31 in Germany and later continued to torment listeners as the theme song of the ARD TV lottery — as a "youthful sin."
But it is still played at the Allianz Arena. The lyrics and music came from Kurt Hertha and Rolf Arland, who normally worked for hit-guaranteeing acts like Al Martino or Alice & Ellen Kessler. With Franz, even this dynamic duo was powerless — or perhaps they simply had a bad day with their listless rhyming ("Laß doch die andern reden, was kann denn schon geschehn, wir wollen heut und morgen nicht auseinander gehen"). The B-side of the Polydor single, incidentally, was called "Du allein" — just in case it ever comes up on a quiz show...
The song remained in demand years later, too. "Die Amigos," "Marianne & Michael" and "Die jungen Zillertaler" — traditionally always right on the cutting edge of good taste — covered "Gute Freunde."
Then It Goes Boom
Gerd Müller ventured into the recording studio in 1969 — and out came an embarrassing piece of work.
With FC Bayern, things had gone "boom" for Gerd Müller in the form of Bundesliga goals 365 times. He should have left it at this sporting component. Instead, the man from Nördlingen ventured into the recording studio in 1969 — and out came "Dann macht es Bumm" (Then It Goes Boom), an embarrassing piece of work that not even the B-side "Wenn das runde Leder rollt" (When the Round Ball Rolls) could salvage.
One could practically detect Müller's lack of enthusiasm for the project during the singing — for this episode from the series "Rhyme It, Or I'll Eat You!" "Jeden Samstagnachmittag, ja da ist was los" (Every Saturday afternoon, there's something going on), the Bomber toiled, "immer wieder ist die Spannung riesengroß" (the excitement is always huge). "Alle wollen Tore sehn, das ist sonnenklar, wenn es klappt, dann ist es wunderbar" (Everyone wants to see goals, that's crystal clear; if it works out, then it's wonderful). To his credit, wife Uschi conceded years later that her Gerd would certainly never do it again.
Finally Gold
Jean-Marie Pfaff donated his Gold Record to Pope John Paul II — the Pope's reaction to the lyrics is not recorded.
Before a Bayern record could go "gold," the Belgian Jean-Marie Pfaff first had to arrive from SK Beveren in Munich in 1982. Musically, the goalkeeper didn't necessarily cut a better figure than Franz and Gerd Müller before him. But: he marketed the cringe-disc "Jetzt bin ich ein Bayer" (Now I'm a Bavarian) simply more professionally. Not only that.
He even donated the Gold Record to Pope John Paul II during an audience. The extent to which the Pope came to terms with the lyric "Ich trinke Bier und esse Leberkäs mit Eier" (I drink beer and eat Leberkäs with eggs) is not recorded.
Rummenigge (All Night Long)
An English couple wrote a cult trash classic about Rummenigge's sexy knees after watching him at Wembley.
Only indirectly involved — and in hindsight, you have to say that's a genuine shame — in Bayern's assault on the charts was Karl-Heinz Rummenigge. The English couple Alan and Denise Whittle hit upon the idea that would change their lives on 13 October 1982, at the international England vs Germany at London's Wembley Stadium (1-2).
The two lovers were so smitten with the "sexy knees" of DFB star Karl-Heinz Rummenigge that they spontaneously took pen to paper and produced "Rummenigge" (All Night Long) — a cult trash classic revolving around FC Bayern. The accompanying video clip was made on a minimal budget and could well have been shot in Alan and Denise's living room.
At any rate, they knew of a football player "over in West Germany" who had "sexy knees"... In Germany, "Rummenigge" — initially "annoyed" by the song — dribbled its way to number 43 in the charts. The hastily released German-language version featured Wolfgang Fierek and Cleo Kretschmer: "Rummenigge — Tag und Nacht" (Day and Night).
And we stand by it: a shame that Karl-Heinz Rummenigge was annoyed. A vocal turn alongside Wolfgang Fierek would have been worth every penny. As it is, aficionados of the football-Schlager scene are left with Rummenigge's appearances in "Olé España" and "Mexico mi amor" with Michael Schanze and Peter Alexander ahead of the 1982 and 1986 World Cups. Plus that. What a shame!
Karl-Heinz Rummenigge as TV Co-Commentator
Simple facts were made complicated; for complicated facts, he fell back on Dadaist sentence constructions.
The depths of musical artistry were matched only by Karl-Heinz's feats of verbal acrobatics as a co-commentator for ARD in the 1990s.
A textbook case of rhetorical chance. Simple facts were made complicated; for complicated facts, he fell back on Dadaist sentence constructions. Gerd Rubenbauer and Heribert Faßbender on one side, Rummenigge as sidekick — that was four years of ARD football television before the turn of the millennium. Rummenigge: "If you come down the right, the back centre has to drift left, otherwise there'll be collapses at the front."
Bets, Scandals and Transfers
Match-fixing suspicions, a legendary bet and the key transfers of the recent era.
Welcome to the Losers' Cup — St Petersburg 2008
Bayern lost the UEFA Cup semi-final 0-4 — and Spanish prosecutors investigated match-fixing.
The dark rumour about Bayern's 0-4 in St Petersburg. On 1 May 2008, FC Bayern München lost the UEFA Cup semi-final second leg 0-4 to Zenit St Petersburg. It was Bayern's heaviest European defeat since the 1980 UEFA Cup semi-final at Eintracht Frankfurt (1-5). But unlike in May 1980 at Frankfurt's Waldstadion, the match at the Petrovsky Stadium in St Petersburg had a whiff of something fishy.
Spanish prosecutors investigated on suspicion that the match — which the Russians won through goals from Pavel Pogrebnyak (2), Konstantin Zyrianov and Viktor Fayzulin (first leg: 1-1) — involved bribery. The National Court in Madrid confirmed shortly afterwards that an investigation had been opened. The German champions responded with a cautious written statement. "FC Bayern München are no more aware of this suspicion than the Munich public prosecutor's office.
We will endeavour to obtain any relevant information on this matter." The match, according to Spanish newspapers El País and ABC shortly afterwards, was said to have been sold for €50 million. Their claim and the Spanish judiciary's assumption were based on wiretapped telephone conversations between Russian mafia bosses in Spain. The head of an influential criminal enterprise allegedly boasted to a colleague of having bought Zenit's semi-final success "for 50 million." The currency was not specified.
The suspected mafia boss was arrested in Spain in the spring of 2008. The investigators, however, appeared to be on thin ice. "It is not even clear whether the 'purchase' of a football match abroad constitutes a criminal offence under Spanish law," the newspaper ABC rowed back shortly afterwards. It was not until 2010 that the truth emerged: the match-fixing allegations, which both Bayern and eventual UEFA Cup winners Zenit St Petersburg denied, came from a fraudster.
Robin Boksic was his name, and he was an employee of UEFA chief investigator Peter Limbacher. His boss had, as DIE ZEIT and STERN reported on 15 September 2010, fallen for false information that was later also mentioned in a FIFA dossier. And the Croatian Boksic had since been exposed as a con man...
Klinsmann vs IM Lothar — Top, the Bet Is On!
Matthäus bet 10,000 marks with Hoeneß that Klinsmann wouldn't score 15 goals.
There is not much that Lothar Matthäus — captain, alpha male and all-round synonym for FC Bayern München during its Hollywood years from 1995 — did not undertake to discredit Jürgen Klinsmann.
The Franconian, traditionally close to the BILD newspaper — whose teammates later claimed he had "installed a direct line from the Bayern dressing room to the BILD newsroom" — and whom many privately called only "IM Lothar" (a reference to East German Stasi informants), because so many internal matters, or "indernal" matters, as Matthäus himself would say, found their way into the tabloid in often miraculous fashion, hatched a perfidious plan. He had not forgiven Klinsmann for nonchalantly marching up to national coach Berti Vogts before Euro 96, together with Thomas Helmer and Dortmund's Matthias Sammer, and asking the coach not to select Matthäus for the tournament in England.
Only that way, Klinsmann argued, would a successful European Championship be possible. Vogts followed the trio's advice, did not select Matthäus, and inadvertently triggered the next escalation in the permanent feud between "Klinsi" and "Loddar." "Klinsmann is cowardly, selfish and only in it for the money" was just one of Lothar's poison arrows aimed at the Swabian who played in Munich.
What Klinsmann did not know: Matthäus bet 10,000 marks with manager Uli Hoeneß against his nemesis. He believed that Klinsmann would not manage to score 15 goals in the 1996/97 season, which Bayern would end as German champions. Morally in the relegation zone, this was also a poor idea from a technical standpoint. In his debut season in Munich, 1995/96, Klinsmann had already scored 16 times. Somehow Klinsmann got wind of what Lothar was planning — unsurprisingly, given that Matthäus never exactly kept quiet about such things in public. "Klinsi" went on the offensive. For FC Bayern and their fans, fortunately, on the pitch!
My Diary
Klinsmann smashed in the winning goal in the 90th minute of the final matchday to ensure Matthäus lost his bet.
The spectators at the venerable Bökelbergstadion in Mönchengladbach were puzzled on matchday 34. In the newly crowned German champions FC Bayern's 2-2 draw in Gladbach, Jürgen Klinsmann smashed the ball into the net in the 90th minute with such ferocity that it seemed as if he wanted to rip the net apart before the title celebrations began.
What the fans in the stands and many others across football-mad Germany did not know: it was the goal with which Klinsmann, in the very last minute of the season, ensured that Matthäus lost his bet with Hoeneß. A little later, everyone found out. Lothar Matthäus published his war with Klinsmann and other juicy titbits under the title Mein Tagebuch (My Diary) and won new friends daily. "I note this with incomprehension; slowly, all I can do is laugh about it," said national goalkeeper Andreas Köpke, while Bayern keeper Oliver Kahn could no longer bear to hear the name "Matthäus": "We are German champions, nothing else matters.
I don't operate at that level. I know what went on. I don't need to read the diary — I was there." To the accusation from the Klinsmann camp that the high sum wagered could have brought joy to many children in Africa, Matthäus delivered a final counter: "If you add the two million marks that Jürgen had struck out of his contract last year as a release clause, we're already at two million and ten thousand marks.
You could indeed have done an awful lot with that." At the end of the 1996/97 season, Klinsmann had had enough of the limbo of standards and moved to Sampdoria Genoa. Not without landing one last blow on his adversary, with whom he would reconcile only years later: "I feel sorry for the Bayern players, because they'll have the problems with Lothar in the future. I no longer have them — I'm gone. Thank God."
Key Transfers 2020–2025
Lewandowski forced his exit, Mané flopped, Kane broke records, Musiala became world-class.
Robert Lewandowski forced his departure to FC Barcelona in the summer of 2022. "My story at Bayern is over," he said publicly — a bitter split that dragged on for weeks before the transfer was completed for ~€45 million. In his last full season, 2020/21, he broke Gerd Müller's 49-year-old Bundesliga record with 41 goals.
Sadio Mané arrived from Liverpool in the summer of 2022 for ~€32 million and became a flop — after just one season he moved to Al-Nassr in Saudi Arabia.
Harry Kane arrived in the summer of 2023 for a club-record fee of ~€100 million from Tottenham Hotspur. In his first season he scored 36 Bundesliga goals and won the Torjägerkanone. In his second season, he won his first championship of any kind.
Jamal Musiala, who arrived from Chelsea's youth academy in 2020, developed into a world-class player under Flick and became the most valuable player in the squad.
Leroy Sané (2020 from Manchester City) and Alphonso Davies (who broke through under Flick) also shaped the era; Sané moved to Galatasaray in 2025.
- Kane fee
- ~€100m (club record)
- Lewandowski exit
- ~€45m to Barcelona
- Mané
- ~€32m, 1 season, flop